Lorein's brother Ammon had some good rebuttal arguments to my post about squeezing from the middle. Specifically, he said his wife, Kathy, timed him to determine how long it took to "convert a middle squozen tube into a bottom squozen tube" and it came out to be 3 seconds. His comment implied that such a time length is trivial and I should not get all worked up over such insignificance. I admit that at first this argument was quite persuasive to me, but then I got to thinking . . . 3 seconds a day is 18 minutes and 15 seconds a year. Assuming an average 72 year lifespan, that's 49,275 seconds I will spend from the moment I turn 27 (which is next Friday!) repairing the toothpaste tube. For those of you who cannot quickly convert seconds into minutes and hours in your head, that's 821 minutes and 15 seconds, or 13 hours and 40-something minutes. With those 13+ hours, I could be feeding the poor in South America or reading "Where the Wild Things Are" to inner-city kids. But instead, I'm stuck in the bathroom fixing the toothpaste. In other words, middle squeezers keep us bottom squeezers from making the world a better place. Does that seem trivial to you? Is that insignificant?
On another note, the pizzeria opened! I saw on Friday they had taken the plastic down from the windows, and then when we walked by Saturday night, the lights were on and there were people inside! I'm pretty stoked and definitely planning to hit it up in the next week or so. Nearly three years, and finally no longer "Coming Soon".
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3 comments:
Wow, just think of all the things you could do with the time you spend watching Sports Center and PTI. You could really make this world a better place:-)
I don't watch much Sports Center and watching PTI counts as making the world a better place because it exposes Carter to people from many different cultures and makes him appreciate each individual for his or her accomplishments and avoid stereotyping.
This is a fairly persuasive argument, but it is wrong on a very important point.
You are assuming that it takes the same amount of time to squeeze from the bottom of the tube as it does to squeeze from the middle of the tube. I would argue that it takes more care and concentration to squeeze from the bottom of the tube than the middle. As a middle-squeezer myself, I find it easier to just grab the middle, squeeze, and then I'm on my way making the world a better place.
I will recognize, however, that there is a cost: when you get to the end of the tube. Naturally, a bottom squozen tube will be easier to get all of the toothpaste out. To do the same for a middle squozen tube would require to repair it by squeezing from the bottom. As noted, it takes approximately three seconds to convert a middle-squozen tube to a bottom squozen one. I think that those three seconds saved are less, on aggregate than the cumulative extra effort involved in squeezing from the bottom. Just one bottom squeeze at the end is better than a bottom squeeze every time.
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